The relationship between husband and wife is very much like a contractual agreement. In such relationships each party agrees to give certain things in exchange for receiving certain things. The relationship between husband and wife is not at all one-sided, but a mutual exchange of giving and receiving.
As mentioned in the comment on Ephesians 5:22 where wives are told to submit to their husbands, there are many people who only point out the instruction for women to submit to the man. What they usually overlook is the command given to husbands.
What are husbands commanded to do? What comparison is made?
I think it interesting to note that the passage regarding wives submitting to their husbands is only three verses long (Ephesians 5:22-24). The passage regarding husbands and their obligation to their wives is five verses long (Ephesians 5:25-29).
Ephesians 5:25 instructs husbands to “love” their wives. The word “submit” is not used as it is with the passage regarding wives. However, if a man truly loves his wife then submission to her will be a large part of that relationship. Once again, the relationship between husband and wife is not one of an important person ruling over a lesser person. It is a connection of mutual care and encouragement.
We again have a qualifier in the passage on husbands. They are to love their wives “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” The husband’s love must be an all-consuming love. It must be so strong a love that the man will not value himself over his wife. He must be willing to sacrifice all for his spouse.
As Christ loved the church, men should love their wives. Such a love involves the husband prizing the wife more than himself, wanting what is best for her even if it means giving up something for himself. Such a love involves the desire to be in the presence of the wife, to delight in her company, and to want what pleases her.
It is important to note that Ephesians 5:31 recalls the words of Jesus (Matthew 19:5) and God (Genesis 2:24) – “the two will become one flesh.” The relationship of husband to wife is a connection of one-ness. It is a connection of wholeness, and as such requires that both wife and husband submit to one another – putting the other first – and love one another with a willingness to sacrifice at every occasion. The relation of wife to husband is one of mutual care, support and aid.
DAILY CHALLENGE: How can you love your significant other in the same way Christ loved the church?
